


Unimaginable

by screamingatstars



Category: She-Ra and the Princesses of Power (2018)
Genre: Angst, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/F, Kid Finn, Nightmares, Post-Canon, Trauma
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-18
Updated: 2020-07-18
Packaged: 2021-03-05 02:34:57
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,383
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25366936
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/screamingatstars/pseuds/screamingatstars
Summary: Catra wakes up from a nightmare and needs to know Finn is okay. Adora finds them, and comforts her wife.Title from the song ‘It’s Quiet Uptown’ from Hamilton.
Relationships: Adora/Catra (She-Ra)
Comments: 10
Kudos: 213





	Unimaginable

**Author's Note:**

> This was originally based off of lyrics from the Hamilton song ‘It’s Quiet Uptown’, which is also where I got the title from, but then I added some hurt/comfort so it wasn’t all angst. 
> 
> For context, Finn is about eight or nine years old in this fic. Hope you enjoy!

“There are moments that the words don’t reach

There is suffering too terrible to name

You hold your child as tight as you can

And push away the unimaginable”

Catra was back on Horde Prime’s flagship, on her knees in front of his throne. Somehow, impossibly, she was surrounded by the monotone chants of his clones, invisible in the darkness at the edges of her vision. His cold stare pierced into her bones, stabbing into all her deepest fears and oldest nightmares, and the sights and sounds were too real, too present, too-

“Do not fret, little sister.” His voice was smooth and calm, but it grated in her mind like claws on metal, and when she slammed her hands over her ears it made no difference. “I have brought you a reward for your invaluable assistance in defeating She-Ra, at long last.”

Ice flooded her veins. No, it couldn’t be, this wasn’t right. Horde Prime was dead, wasn’t he? She-Ra had gotten rid of him,  _ Adora  _ had gotten rid of him! They had won! So how was he here, in front of her, thanking her for betraying Adora as if nothing had changed? 

Footsteps behind her, approaching and then stopping.

“Go on,” Horde Prime encouraged, eyes narrowing as his mouth turned up into a sneer. “Look upon your prize. You earned them.”

Her heart plummeted into her stomach, and she didn’t remember standing up or turning around. One moment, she was staring up in abject horror at the monster in white, the next...

A small figure stood between two clones, less than half their height, but dressed in identical robes. Their eyes glowed the same acid green as the rest of Horde Prime’s army, expression eerily level, but the face so familiar, reminiscent of her own…

_ No. _

_ Anything but this. _

Catra was frozen in place as she stared into her child’s empty eyes, the green she saw there so viscerally wrong, so different from the bright blue they were supposed to be.

“I believe you called them Finn, once. Is that right, little sister?”

She fell to her knees again, palms hitting the cold metal of the floor. Finn smiled at her, the action so much smaller and more controlled than normal, and Catra felt her heart breaking into a million tiny pieces as stunned tears spilled over her cheeks. 

She couldn’t tear her gaze away. She couldn’t look anywhere but at her child, her child, wearing that horrid white and seeing her through green-tinted eyes.

_ No. _

_ Stop this, please… _

“Why are you crying?” Said Finn, and hearing their young voice so cold and unfamiliar and quiet tore a wail out of her throat.

“No,” she cried, lungs fighting for air. “Please, don’t-“

“Everything is alright,” they went on, as if she hadn’t spoken, each word like a knife directly into Catra’s chest. “Horde Prime has brought me into the light. He saved me from  _ you. _ I’m happy here. You’ll be joining us.”

Hands grabbed at her arms, wrestling her to the floor, pushing her hair away from her neck. She tried to fight, but her limbs wouldn’t obey, and she was powerless to do anything but scream as a cold disk pressed into her skin, all the while Finn stood motionless, smiling down at her, green veins spreading from their eyes over their face and enveloping everything around them until-

Catra was shooting bolt upright in her bed, gasping for breath in the darkness as the nightmare lingered in her mind. She could still see green at the edges of her vision, and before she could think about it she was scrambling out of bed, not bothering to be quiet or to close the door behind her as she sprinted down the hall. 

Nothing mattered except getting to the next room. She had to check, because if they weren’t there…

Heart beating out of her chest, desperate tears streaming down her cheeks, she threw open the door to Finn’s room. 

There they were, curled up inside a nest of blankets, sound asleep. Catra hurried to their side and checked the back of their neck, not daring to breathe until she ran her fingers over the short fur there and met no trace of a chip.

They were safe. Her child was safe.

She held in her sobs, taking a deep breath in a vain attempt to settle her racing heartbeat before carefully picking Finn up, taking a seat on the floor and cradling them close. They were a deep sleeper, so they didn’t stir, but the sound of their gentle purring filled the air.

Catra buried her face in their hair, breathing in their familiar scent, trying to reassure herself. Her child was here. They weren’t captured, they weren’t chipped, they were safe in her arms.

She didn’t want to imagine what would happen otherwise.

She didn’t know how long she stayed there, clutching Finn close and crying silently, before the sound of footsteps reached her ears. Instantly, she felt her fur standing on end as she whipped her head up, about to hiss for all she was worth at whatever intruder was coming, to defend her family-

“Catra?”

It was Adora. Yawning, hair messy and loose, carrying the blanket from their bed. “What’s going on? Is everything okay?”

Catra’s grip on Finn tightened. Everything was not okay.  _ She  _ was not okay. 

She shook her head once, tersely, unable to form words.

Adora’s expression softened, understanding. Closing the door behind her, she approached quietly, taking a seat next to Catra on the floor. 

“Another nightmare?” She whispered, breath warm against her ear. Catra nodded, looking down at Finn to avoid her gaze.

“Which one?”

“Finn,” Catra choked out, squeezing her eyes shut against the sights that tried to flare up.

_ Finn with green eyes, dressed in white, that cold smile- _

A familiar hand touched her arm, grounding her back in reality. Adora leaned against her side, wrapping an arm around her shoulders. Catra whimpered, turning her head and burying her face in Adora’s shirt.

“I’m here, Catra,” she heard her say. “We both are. We won, remember? You’ll never have to see him ever again.”

“I know that,” Catra whispered, releasing her hold on Finn as gently as she could and settling them carefully across her lap. “You’ve said it a million times, why can’t I seem to figure that out already? I know we’ve won! I know he’s gone! But I still keep seeing him, and I’m still terrified that one day I’m going to wake up and the nightmare won’t end! Why is this still happening, all these years later, when we’ve moved on with our lives? I know these things, Adora!”

“I know you know,” Adora said patiently, taking her hand and twining their fingers together. “But it’s like Perfuma says: fighting a war left all of us with our own trauma. That’s not something that just goes away, no matter how much time passes or how we’ve moved on with our lives. I still get flashbacks, you still get nightmares. And that’s okay. I’ll keep reminding you as long as you need me to, I don’t mind. I’ll do whatever it takes to get you through these nightmares every time.”

“You’d really still put up with  _ this-“  _ Catra gestured around herself, indicating the whole situation- “for the rest of our lives?” She was aware she sounded hysterical, but it hadn’t woken Finn, so she couldn’t bring herself to care.

Adora lifted their joined hands to her lips, pressing a tender kiss against Catra’s knuckles. “I married you, didn’t I? Pretty sure that’s part of the deal.” 

She let out a long, shuddering breath, feeling her heart rate beginning to slow for the first time since she woke up. A few stray tears coursed down her face, and Adora held her close, shifting Finn so they were laying on both of their laps, letting Catra steady her breathing and finally relax with her wife and child.

Slowly, as the minutes ticked by without any kind of disturbance, Catra’s eyelids began to grow heavy, her vision going dark as she slipped back into a peaceful sleep, the terrors in her head pacified by the presence of her family around her. 

And, for that moment at least, everything was okay.


End file.
